AstroSLAMMED! And Lovin' Every Prophecy Revealed...

In a universe that becomes more and more isolated, I have looked above and beyond for inspiration. BK (Before Kids) I would be inspired by a movie, a book or any other outlet that required my undivided attention for hours at a time… Enter: Children. Exit: Free Time. Where's a girl to look for guidance from an unbiased third party? Enter: Astrology.com

Before you pigeon-hole me as a flake (I know my dad would), let's get a couple of things straight. YES, I read the disclaimer that reiterates this is for entertainment purposes and should not be taken literally. And while generic foreshadowing based on a person's birthdate seems too general for an "accurate reading," provide the date, EXACT time and place you were born and voila: a no-holds barred prediction straight from the astrologers mouth OR mathematical conclusions of the stars based on their latitude and longitude alignment at the exact time and location of your birth.

I thought it would be fun to post these and decipher their relativity as it relates to "My So Called Life." (LOVED that show; circa 1994. All 19 episodes of it.)

A.S.= AstroSlam M=Mary's Reflection A.S.: Your inability to form relationships with other people chips away at your soul.

M: You ain't whistlin' dixie...Another way to phrase it with a more positive spin: My constraints as a single mom make maintaining and forging new relationships close to impossible.

A.S.There has to be a better way to spend your energy!

M: Really? Tell me how, AstroSlam. Be my guide…Is this the part when you ask me to pay $9.99?

A.S: Waiting for others to contact you is dreadful, because your phone is ever silent and your inbox is always empty.

M: More like, your mobile phone plan is maxed out and at .40 cents a minute, are you worth the call? My inbox currently has over 1700 unopened e-mails, mostly from would-be friends who also call themselves "SPAM." The fools…